"On Edge ..."

 I am really on edge today, very jumpy and anxious also super depressed.


Being bipolar is not fun.


I think a lot of it is that I am nervous about starting over. I don’t want to start over, I want my wife back I want my life back...I want to try and fix this, from her perspective she has been trying for a long time. I didn’t know it was this bad...I never thought after 20 years it would just end...my world is crumbling around me and there is nothing I can do to shore it up. I have to watch it crumble.


I have tried too hard all my life and it was always a fight..tried too hard just to function ..not to prosper, just function.

I am so tired of fighting.


I am so tired of losing.


I am so tired of the struggle.


I am so tired...


I am just so done with it all...


fuck


R-

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